Last night we got together with great friends of ours. After dinner, while babies and toddlers were playing sweetly the grown ups got out a deck of cards and some poker chips. If Kim Kardashian's sisters find her the be boring than certainly they would think I am about as much fun to hang out with as a rotting corpse.times out of 10 I would choose to stay home than to go out, but bless the friends who will come and see me so I am not a total recluse. Anyway, all of this to say I had to be taught to play poker last night.
Not only did I learn the rules and
I am not a risk taker.
I do not bet.
I do not raise.
I will fold for no reason on a winning hand because I am not confident enough to take a chance.
Thankfully my good friend kept urging me not to fold and to stay in the game. I even ended up winning a couple hands.
This poker "strategy" (to lose) carries over into my everyday life in every way. You know the phrase "even if you finish last you are still beating the people still on the couch?" Well I am the one still on the couch. I am researching and googling and educating myself of the best techniques, pinning the most motivational quotes, finding the best recipes to make sure I can finish the race, but when the trigger is pulled I am still on the couch. I won't finish the race because I am too scared of coming in last.
For a few years now I have owned an entry level DSLR camera. I have always been interested in photography since the very first cheap film camera my grandma gave me when I was 5. I get it from my mom. Every ounce of creativity I have is directly from her. Since I have had this camera I have taken classes, read several articles, pinned photography tips, looked into starting a business, read branding advice, everything but actually pulling the trigger and taking the steps necessary to starting a business and working toward my dream.
Yesterday, I asked Cody if we could take a trip to see my family in Northwest Georgia. I used to spend a couple weeks there every summer and it holds such a special place in my heart. Cody has never been and he has never met my family there except a quick hello at our wedding. It would mean so much to me to be able to go with him and our kids next fall. Cody quickly responded that he would make it happen IF I set a difficult and measurable goal for myself over the next year. Immediately I thought of photography. Together we agreed that if I photograph at least 24 "sessions" (not including our kids) and at least 1 each month then we will pack up and road trip on down to GA.
I am so excited.
For finally putting my dreams into motion. For making plans to go on this trip.
I am humbled.
Several friends and family members are already planning on helping me achieve this goal and are rooting for me. Their excitement, encouragement and support means so much. I don't bet on myself, but I have so many others betting on me. Its a very humbling feeling and I feel so loved.
I am thankful for Cody who knows just how hard to push without being too pushy. For always being my biggest encouragement and support. He is so wonderful.
I have my first "shoot" on the books for November 2 and I am so nervous, but I am excited and thankful for this opportunity AND looking forward to catching up with old family friends.
We'll see how this plays out. Hopefully I get on a winning streak.